What to Do When Everything Feels Like It’s Falling Apart

Life has a way of throwing curveballs. One moment, you’re financially stable, saving money, even helping others, and the next, you’re drowning in debt, wondering how things got so bad. That’s exactly where I am right now. Debt collectors are knocking, savings are gone, and I need a way out.

How I Got Here

I’ve always been good with money. My relationships—with family, friends, and even my spirituality—are in a good place. But like many, finances are my biggest struggle.

I used to be debt-free. Then, life happened. I lost my job overseas during the pandemic. I had enough emergency savings, but a big chunk went to my brother’s medical bills—a choice I don’t regret because I wanted to help him in his battle with chronic kidney failure, which lasted 18 years. Unfortunately, in August 2023, he passed away.

Even after losing my job, I didn’t sit still. I started teaching English online in June 2020, which kept me afloat and even allowed me to start saving again. But then, my dream of opening a spa business wouldn’t leave me alone.

My business partner provided the capital, but I invested my time, effort, and resources. That meant cutting down on my teaching hours—meaning less income. I was so focused on making the spa work that I didn’t realize how much it was affecting my personal finances.

Then, things piled up.

Three months before opening, I was already spending more than I was earning. I tapped into my savings. Six months after launching, the spa was still losing money—which I expected—but what I failed to calculate was how much I personally would struggle during this period.

And now, here I am. Debt collectors calling, borrowed money from family and friends, and wondering how to fix this.

What Now? Here’s the Advice I’ve Received

I’ve turned to the internet, financial experts, and people around me for guidance. Here’s what they told me:

1. Accept and Own the Situation

📌 Advice: Stop beating yourself up. Acknowledge the problem without shame. It’s not about regretting past choices; it’s about finding solutions.

💡 What I plan to do: I’ve already accepted reality. There’s no point in dwelling on "what ifs." Now, it’s time to act.

2. Write Down Every Debt and Expense

📌 Advice: Make a list of all debts, due dates, interest rates, and expenses to get a full picture of the situation.

💡 What I plan to do: I started tracking my expenses, and wow—I didn’t realize how much I was spending. I need to cut down immediately.

3. Find Ways to Increase Income

📌 Advice: The quickest way out of debt is to earn more. Find side gigs, take on extra work, or monetize skills.

💡 What I plan to do:

• Increase my online teaching hours—this is my most stable income source.

• Look for freelance work—maybe in hospitality consulting.

• Sell things I don’t need—I have some stuff lying around that I can turn into quick cash.

4. Negotiate with Creditors

📌 Advice: Talk to lenders and negotiate lower interest rates or extended payment terms.

💡 What I plan to do: This one scares me, but I’ll try. Maybe some of them will agree to a manageable payment plan.

5. Stop Borrowing More Money

📌 Advice: Don’t take out more loans to cover old ones. It only makes things worse.

💡 What I plan to do: No more borrowing. I’ll focus on repaying what I already owe.

6. Cut Unnecessary Expenses

📌 Advice: Every peso counts. Cut back on non-essentials.

💡 What I plan to do:

• No more food deliveries—I’ll cook at home.

• No online shopping—Only buy what I truly need.

• Reduce unnecessary subscriptions—Do I really need all of them?

7. Keep Pushing the Spa Business

📌 Advice: Don’t give up on the business yet. Many businesses take time to turn profitable.

💡 What I plan to do:

• Improve marketing—I need more customers ASAP.

• Offer special promos—Maybe discounted packages to attract repeat clients.

• Optimize operations—See if there are ways to cut costs without sacrificing quality.

8. Stay Mentally and Emotionally Strong

📌 Advice: Money problems are overwhelming, but stress won’t solve anything. Take care of your mental health.

💡 What I plan to do:

• Take breaks—Even just short walks outside.

• Talk to supportive people—I don’t have to carry this burden alone.

• Remind myself that this is temporary.

Final Thoughts: Will This Work?

Honestly? I don’t know yet.

I’m going to try these strategies and see what works. Maybe some will make a huge difference. Maybe I’ll have to adjust along the way. But one thing is for sure—I won’t give up.

If you’re in the same boat, just know that you’re not alone. We can get through this. One step at a time. 💪

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